A google search that brought a visitor to my site, welcome, or rather thanks for coming, as you are gone by now, was looking for “how to make connections and use them”.

Yes, meeting people through 2.0 is in that category. I had hoped this site was more in the “broaden-and-build” spirit of Barbara Frederickson. While she talks of emotions, I am interested in engagement with life. We both relate, I think, to the metaphor offered my Matthieu Ricard that well being is the depth of the ocean, and emotions are the waves on the surface, large or small.

So how does broaden-and-build differ from making connections and using them.

Firstly, I don’t look around for someone who will help me. I look for who and what interests me and I join in on that basis. I introduce myself on that basis: “You are interesting. What you do is interesting. This is why I find you interesting”.

Secondly, I follow up and I pass on information I have that they could use. The foreigner helps the native.

Thirdly, I stay in touch.

Now some people I contact are not interested in what I do. I haven’t counted the proportion. But because I am interested in what they do, I continue to follow their work. It enriches my life! And I continue to send them anything that is helpful to them.

Only a few people pass information to me. They really stand out. It may be an English-thing. English people will say thankyou, but they may not generate another opportunity to work together. Other cultures are the opposite. Their thanks will be perfunctory but they will suggest ways to do business together again. Celebrate the people who “return the ball”. They are precious and you have like-minds.

And I stay in touch. I notice English people send a lot of notes: thank you cards rather than emails and loads of Xmas cards even if they will see you on Christmas day or thereabouts. But they don’t follow up on business cards , or even exchange them necessarily. There also seems to be UK, of the deep ocean perhaps, and UK of the waves on the surface, maybe. New media and creative people in Britain are fast, quick, cosmopolitan. Have two sets of stationery! Calling card, expensive notepaper, cards and a set of postage stamps for some. And email, Facebook, LinkedIn, Xing, RSS feeds and “moo” cards for others.